ambermarie_1489

Felicia

2008-09-28T06:57:58Z

Okay, I really never use live journal. What is it for?
Well Right now I'm using it to vent.. mostly because I'm to afraid to put this on myspace where I actually know you could read it. As much as I wish you would, I cant imagine fighting again.

We were freinds for TEN years.. maybe more. I laughed harder with you, told you all my secrets, you know everything about me. You WERE my best friend. More like my sister!

Even after everything that ended so horrible, after the worst possible things you could say about me, I still defend you. When my other friends say "you know, I never liked her anyways.." I still cant say a mean thing about you.. although I do admit that you've changed.

I've been okay though, not that you care. I cried everday for I dont know how long. The sound of your name would instantly make me sad. But Time heals I guess, and so like I said, I'm fine.

What hurts though, is today when I see you at the movies, you walke past me like I never existed to you. LIke the ten years we were bestfiends did'nt matter. We couldnt even have a civil "hello how have you been?" or a smile atleast. Davids friend LIz (who I've met twice in my life) was more happy to see me then you were... wow what does that say??

I'm still not crying though, I'm just numb.

Just getting to say that makes me feel a little better.
Even though you will never read it, and things will never be the same.

On a brighter note... I had some well needed freind time today with Jess. She is a true freind and understands me!
We saw eagle eye... and by the way it was AMAZING. I loved it.

Idk who will even read this but I feel better. So thanks for letting it take up space on your computer. lol

Thinking

2008-06-16T04:07:57Z

What is wrong with me today?
I honestly don't know.
I"m happy with everything.
Yet little things scare me.
It's almost a selfish feeling, because I'm afraid of things ruining MY happiness.
I know that's not fair.
But aren't most people the same way?
It seems almost impossible to be this happy like something has to go wrong eventually.
I don't know why I'm being so pessimistic.. I'm almost always the opposite.
Why I'm particularly feeling this way today is beyond me.

I wish I could know for sure things could always stay so perfect.
I really hope they do, becuase I'm truly happier then I thought I could be.

What a great day.

2008-06-06T04:49:24Z

Today got off to a rough start, because i had to stay at work late.
It wasn't to bad though becuase I only ended up working 5 1/2 hours, i can't complain.

After work I had to clean, which is never fun.
But Felicia came over and that made time go by faster.

We spent the whole rest of the day together and I had so much fun!
We talked about our lives, sience we rarely hang out these days.
Also we did al ot of talking about the old days.. it was Amazing

I honestly don't remember the last time i laughed so hard.
Well acutaly I do because I laugh alot.
But iI can't remember the last time Felicia and I laughed so hard together

And to make my day even better, I still got to see David after work! <3

My life is AMAZING!
AND I love my best friend.

First entry

2008-06-05T00:29:25Z

So, I've never used live journal before. It seem pretty cool, but its no myspace. lol
We'll see what happens with it. =)